RIP Juliet Spencer
by TheShulesLovin'Psycho
Summary: On Shawn's birthday, Juliet and Lassiter are working a case (no surprises there!) when suddenly, something bad happens to Jules! Sorry, I suck at summaries, but I don't want to give too much away, although the title sort of already does... This story is set in the future, with a married Shules and three little Spencers. Rated T for language and violence.
1. The Kidnapping

**Disclaimer: No, I do not own Psych. Never have, and never will, apparently...**

* * *

_1986_

_8-year-old Shawn stood in the open doorway of the house, his arms crossed stubbornly and a defiant pout spreading over his face._

_"Dad, why does she have to leave? This is your fault, isn't it? You're sending her away 'cause of your work? 'Cause your work's too important for her? Is that why?"_

_Henry Spencer turned to his only son and sighed. Upon seeing his dad's face, Shawn immediately regretted what he'd said. Henry's eyes were full of grief and pain, something Shawn had never seen before._

_"Let me tell you something, Shawn. You know what the hardest thing in life is?"_

_Shawn shook his head, intrigued._

_"The hardest thing in life is saying goodbye to someone you love more than anything in the world. Knowing that you'll never see them again. That's the hardest thing."_

_Shawn stared at his dad, his eyes wide. He had never heard his dad like this before, weary, slightly angry, but mostly sad. Shawn knew that his life would never be the same again. Suddenly, they heard footsteps behind them and turned to see Shawn's mother smiling sadly at them._

_"Goodbye, Henry," she said. She kissed Shawn goodbye, whispered, "'Bye, Goose", and walked away. Shawn turned to his dad again. There were tears in Henry's eyes._

_"I hope you never have to go through that, Shawn," whispered Henry, and as Shawn's mother turned and waved at them one last time, Shawn couldn't help by agree. He hoped so too. And Madeleine Spencer drove away, leaving Shawn and Henry standing there in the dust._

* * *

Present

Shawn walked through the door of his house, expecting to see his kids waiting for him. Instead he almost screamed.

"Surprise!" six different voices yelled as one. There were streamers hanging from the walls, and a large banner that read, 'Happy Birthday, Shawn!' in bold letters. 9-year-old Emily and Zeke, his two eldest children, waved ecstatically to him, lifting 4-year-old Sophie up so that she could see. His parents and his best friend Gus were smiling at him. The only person missing was-

"Where's Juliet?" asked Shawn. As if to answer his question, Gus's phone beeped loudly.

"That's her," said Gus as he read the text aloud.

"Tell Shawn to call me as soon as she comes."

Shawn grinned as he pulled out his phone.

"Hey, Jules," he said, smiling as he talked to his wife. "Where are you?"

"Hey, Shawn," he heard her tired voice. "Sorry I couldn't come to your party, but we just found a major lead in this case we're working, and so Carlton and I couldn't be there. But-"

"O'Hara! Stop talking to Spencer and get over here now!" Lassiter interrupted.

"It's Spencer now," Juliet yelled back. He grinned. Lassiter had always refused to call her Spencer even after ten years of them being married. "I should probably go. Bye, Shawn," she said, hanging up before he even had the chance to say goodbye back to her. In the distance he heard Lassiter yelling again; he sounded really mad, and he didn't blame Juliet for leaving so abruptly.

A few hours later, Shawn was laughing and talking happily to his family, so engrossed in conversation that he didn't hear Juliet's call when it came and subsequently went straight to voicemail. Then, when he went back to find his phone, which he had left on the table before they had gone into the greatly decorated backyard, he got another call.

"Shawn? This is Chief Vick." Shawn could hear in the Chief's voice that the news she was about to deliver wasn't good.

"Hey, Chief, what's up? Calling to wish me a happy birthday?" he joked nervously.

"Not quite. Juliet told you she was working a case, right?"

"Right," answered Shawn uneasily. The Chief sighed.

"Well, Detectives Lassiter and Spencer were driving to a crime scene when someone started shooting at them. They tried to get out of the car, but…"

"What happened?"

"Detective Lassiter called for backup, and Juliet was, well…"

"_What happened_?" Why wouldn't the Chief give him any straight answers?

"She was kidnapped, Mr. Spencer. They exchanged shots, and in the ensuing chaos that followed, Detective Lassiter, he-he noticed that she was gone."

"Gone? What do you mean, gone? How did Lassiter not notice before?"

"She disappeared. We found a bloodstain on the ground near the site, but otherwise there's no trace of her."

"So-So she was kidnapped?" Everyone at the party turned to Shawn, confused.

"I believe that that's what I just said, Mr. Spencer."

"Shawn, what's going on?" Gus's voice was heard in the background. Shawn didn't answer.

"Look, Shawn, after combing the scene several times, we went back to the police station, and there on the doorstep, we found a package- no fingerprints, or anything, just a small envelope. And in it, there was a disk, and a note." Shawn could hear her fumbling around on her desk to find it.

"The note said, _'Bring your psychic, because this will be the last time you will ever see your detective again.'_"

Shawn dropped the glass of soda he was holding, not even noticing it smash to the floor. Everyone gasped in shock, but Shawn could hear nothing other than the pounding of blood in his ears.

"Hello? Shawn? Can you hear me? Shawn, are you all right?"

"Y-Yeah, Chief, sorry. I'm here."

"Good. You'd better get down to the station ASAP."

His heart racing, Shawn ran out the door, leapt onto his bike and sped away, barely noticing that his entire family was following, even the kids. Shawn only hoped he'd get there in time.

* * *

**Author's Note: (cue dramatic music) So, yes, our favorite detective (sorry, Lassie!) gets kidnapped. Please review! You know you want to...**


	2. At The Station

Chapter 2

"Detective, what happened?" Shawn heard his father say to Lassiter as they burst into the station. Shawn was staring at the small piece of paper on the Chief's desk. Taped to it was a photo of Juliet gagged and tied to a chair.

"What's going on?" Buzz McNab walked up to them, concern evident on his face.

"It's Spencer." said Lassiter simply. Buzz frowned.

"Um… Shawn's right there," he said, with the air of someone explaining a simple topic to a very dull child.

"_Detective _Spencer. Juliet. She was kidnapped. We found this note and a disk. We're putting it in now." To illustrate his point, Lassiter slid the disk into his computer and everyone crowded around it.

"Hello, Detectives, Shawn," they heard a deep, raspy voice that they didn't recognize. "You'd better say goodbye to precious little Juliet here, because you'll never have another chance."

"No," Shawn gasped. Gus put a hand on his best friend's shoulder. A person wearing a dark coat and mask prowled into view, dragging Juliet behind him. He forced Juliet into a chair in the center of the room and pointed a gun to her head. Juliet's hands were tied behind her back, her mouth gagged. The man laughed as she desperately struggled against her bonds.

"You see, Shawn, I'm going to kill Detective Spencer here, and you're going to watch me do it." He ripped the gag out of Juliet's mouth. She cursed at him, and then composed herself as he tapped his watch.

"I-I only have a minute to say goodbye, so here goes. Carlton, you-you've been like a brother to me and-and thank you for that. Chief, Buzz, everyone at the station, you've always had my back with ev-every case I've been on, and I appreciate that. Henry, Maddie, thank you for everything. A-And Shawn,"

She paused, looked into the camera. A single tear trickled down her cheek. Shawn reached out to hold her, to comfort her, to tell her that it would be okay, but it was only a computer. He couldn't do anything to save her. Emily and Zeke were, by the looks of it, frozen in shock. Sophie was happily drawing on the Chief's desk, not aware of what was going on.

"Shawn, take care of the kids. I-I love all of you." She seemed to be gaining courage, bracing herself for the inevitable. Her last words were something Shawn and Gus might have laughed at, had it been in a movie. So cliché.

"I love you, Shawn. Goodbye," said Juliet Spencer. There was the sound of a gunshot. And the screen went black.

"No!" screamed about half of the police station, all of whom had crowded around to watch the video. Everyone had tears in their eyes, even those who had barely known Juliet.

Shawn slammed his fist into the computer, and everyone watched it splinter and crack under his assault. No one could blame him.

"No!" he murmured under his breath. Everyone turned to him with sympathy in their eyes. He pushed through the crowd, tears pouring down his face.

"Shawn, where are you going?" yelled Lassiter.

"It's not possible! She's not dead!" Henry and Gus tried to restrain him, but he easily pushed past them. "She's not dead, and I'm gonna prove it."

"Shawn, you're not thinking straight," came the Chief's voice. She realized that her efforts were in vain as the door slammed angrily behind Shawn.

"Spencer, get back here!" yelled Lassiter, running outside. He swore as he chased Shawn into the parking lot. A small family walking outside the station stared at them; it was strange, they knew, to see people running, screaming, and crying all at once, but none of the cops cared. Lassiter swore again.

"She's dead, Spencer, and there's nothing you can do about it!"

"She's not dead!" Shawn's voice echoed across the station. Lassiter took a deep breath.

"Look, Shawn, she was a good cop, but she'd gone now, and you have to accept that. Spencer, where the hell are you going?"

Shawn got onto his bike and drove away. Lassiter made to go after him, but Chief Vick stopped him by placing a hand on his arm.

"It's no use, Carlton," she said finally. Emily and Zeke slowly walked out of the station hand in hand. They were still in shock. Sophie, in Henry's arms, was quiet, having sensed something was wrong.

"Wh-Where's dad?" asked Emily. The Chief and Lassiter glanced at each other guiltily, then looked back into the street, which was now empty of both Shawn and his bike. The officers who hadn't known Juliet looked at them in pity, and the family outside was hastily walking away, but no one seemed to notice any of those things. Because Juliet Spencer was gone.

* * *

**Author's Note: Aww... Look at all the sadness... **

**AngieRosie: I won't spoil anything just yet, but... Don't be too sure of yourself! :) You'll see what I mean...**

**You know, I just realized, I quite like cliche Shawn. Which reminds me, while this story won't always be in character, I will try my best to make them as close to their respective parts on the show as possible.**


	3. To be, or not to be?

6 years later

The Spencer family approached Juliet's grave, tears streaming down each of their faces. It was the anniversary of her death. They hadn't found her killer, heck, hadn't even found her body. They hadn't avenged Juliet, and Shawn still had the scars he'd inflicted upon himself to prove it.

It was a warm spring day, all but bursting with life, and they felt that it was wrong somehow. The sky should be mirroring their emotions, should be as grey and somber as their hearts felt, with rain pouring down from the heavens, as thick with emotion and cold with death's shadow as they were. Suddenly, the family paused. Someone was already standing at the grave. It was a woman, with very messy, long blonde hair.

"Excuse me? Can I help you?" Shawn's voice shook slightly, and as the girl turned around, he gasped. It was Juliet.

"Shawn!" cried the woman. His eyes widened. With the long blonde hair, and the bright blue eyes, she looked exactly like Juliet. Even with the mud and dirt (and was that blood?) coating her entire form, even with the smell emanating from her that suggested that she hadn't washed in years, even with the hollow, devastated look in her eyes, Shawn could still recognize her. But it couldn't be. Juliet was dead, and she had been for six years.

"Uh, wow, I never knew Juliet had any sisters, or, um, cousins that looked exactly like her." Emily, Zeke, and Sophie glanced at each other warily.

"Sh-Shawn, it's me, Juliet!"

Shawn dropped the rose he was holding.

"What?" he asked in shock. His mouth opened, then closed as he looked over her in disbelief. He wanted to believe it, but he knew that it had to be some kind of joke. Her encouraging smile lit up her features like a fire on a cold day, making them more painfully similar to Juliet's.

"B-But you're dead," was the only thing he could say once he had regained control over his senses.

"Shawn, I'm not dead. I'm right here."

Shawn gaped at her. "Yeah, and Gus is psychic. Look, I don't know who you think you are, but I have a gun."

She blinked. "You what?" she asked. Shawn shifted uneasily.

"Yeah, they usually give guns to cops." Now it was her turn to be surprised.

"You're a cop?" A hint of a smile was forming on her face, and Shawn thought that the smile was the most beautiful thing he'd seen in years. He shook his head to clear it- it scared him that he could be thinking things like that- and then showed her his badge.

"Why are you smiling?" he asked. She laughed.

"I just can't imagine you as a cop. Officer Shawn Spencer. It does have a ring to it."

Shawn frowned as he pulled his badge away from the impudent woman. "Who are you, really? Why are you standing at my wife's grave?"

"Shawn, I am your wife." He scoffed at that.

"Well, if you were, you'd know what Juliet said after that case with Tancana, and the bounty hunter stuff, where I got that cool vest." He smiled fondly as he remembered the vest, and what had happened afterwards.

"I told you that it was a mistake. Worst decision of my life, if you ask me." Shawn's jaw dropped.

"H-How did you know that? No, wait. There were cameras in the station. That must have been it."

"Shawn, you're not being logical," she said with a smile.

"Well, there weren't cameras at Declan's house, were there? What happened there?" Shawn looked at closely at her face to try to detect any deceit. He frowned as her smile grew wider, and she exhibited none of the telltale signs of lying.

"_That _time wasn't a mistake. Although I always imagined our first kiss to be more like the one in Canada."

Shawn blinked, then grinned. "I get it. This is a dream, isn't it? Weird, I thought I'd stopped having _good _dreams like this a year ago."

The smile melted off her face. She took a step closer.

"Shawn," she said, taking a deep breath. "Does this feel like a dream?"

She reached up, took his face in his hands, and kissed him. He blinked, surprised, and didn't move. She pulled away, smiling at him, and waited patiently for his reaction. But before he could say a word, they heard another voice.

"Shawn, what in the _hell_ are you doing?" they turned to see Lassiter slowly walking toward them.

"Carlton!" She ran forward and hugged him. He blinked and stared at her, bemused.

"Who the hell are you? You know, I could have you arrested for assaulting a police officer."

The protestations died in his throat as he watched her smile grow wider.

"It's me, Carlton! Juliet!"

He stared at her uncomprehendingly. "What?"

Shawn frowned and walked over to them. "That's what I said too. W-What should we do?"

Lassiter noted the blood and dirt covering her entire body and winced.

"I-I don't- What the hell?" she laughed giddily at the expression on his face, and the others just stared at her. They hadn't heard that laugh in six years.

Saving them from the sticky situation, Marlowe Lassiter walked in. She had wanted to give her husband some space, but, wondering what had taken so long, she had come out of the car only to see the bizarre scene that took place.

"Carlton, what's going on?"

Marlowe's voice seemed to bring Lassiter back to his senses.

"Okay. You, come with me." He said, grabbing the woman's arm. "Shawn, you follow us."

"Where are we going?" asked Shawn. He sighed, resigned.

"To the station."

* * *

"So, Shawn's really a cop?" came the pleasant voice from the back of the car. Having said hi to a very surprised fourteen year old Sarah Lassiter and nine year old Tim, she had been quietly waiting until now, taking in the scenery of the city around her.

Lassiter didn't say anything. Marlowe glanced at her husband before replying, "Yes, he became a detective after, um… About six years ago."

Everyone could tell how she carefully avoided the subject of Juliet's kidnapping. Marlowe continued, "He's partners with Carlton now."

"Really? But I thought you could barely stand him!"

Lassiter grimaced. "He was the only one good enough for the job." Marlowe glanced at him again. It was the voice that she rarely heard, the voice that he used when he was barely holding back tears, trying desperately not to cry. He was as sure as Shawn had been that he was dreaming, but his cop instincts, that he had developed and had learned to rely on after years of being on the force, told him that he was wrong. He shook his head and tried to focus on the road. It was too much to take in at once, and things were spinning way out of control.

Soon, the Lassiters arrived at the police station, the Spencers right behind them, and the ten of them walked into the station. Shawn and Lassiter each gripped one of the girl's arms, not wanting her to make a break for it while she was there. They stopped at the Chief's office and yanked her in after them. Chief Vick stared at them in surprise.

"What's going on here, detectives?" Shawn and Lassiter both opened her mouths to respond, but no sound came out. Frowning, the Chief glanced at both of her detectives before standing up and addressing the woman who had just walked into the office, seemingly mesmerized by the furnishings of the station.

"Can I help you?" she asked kindly, seeing the blood and dirt. The Chief blinked, surprised, as the strange woman ran up and hugged her.

"Wh-Who do you think you are? I'm the Chief of Police, you can't just barge in here and…" her voice faltered as the woman smiled brightly at her. "Chief, it's Juliet! Juliet Spencer."

The Chief blinked again and turned to Shawn and Lassiter.

"I don't know what kind of sick joke this is, detectives, but I wouldn't put it to either of you to do something so absurdly foolish and disrespectful as this." she glared at them, as if daring them to argue. Lassiter cleared his throat.

"It's not a joke, Chief. She just told us that she was Juliet, and-"

"She even proved to me that she was," interrupted Shawn. "She's probably a major stalker, or something like that."

The Chief frowned at them. "I, um… Well, this is a _police station_. Seeing as Juliet was a cop, there is a very simple way to see whether you really are Juliet, and if you aren't, well, you just picked the wrong police station to mess with."

* * *

"It's done," announced Lassiter, holding a sheet of paper in his hand and grinning. After having taken her fingerprints, Lassiter had quickly gotten the results and had come back to see the entire group explaining everything to a very perplexed Officer McNab.

"What is it?" asked Marlowe, after patiently waiting for the dramatic pause her husband had taken. He proudly displayed the results to them.

"It's great to have you back, Juliet," he grinned, pulling her into a hug. Everyone cheered, and Juliet smiled, and, much to his bemusement, kissed his cheek, before pulling away and looking expectantly at Shawn. He was staring at her, his eyes wide.

"No," he breathed in shock and disbelief. "This can't be- I- I won't let this happen!"

The smiles melted off everyone's faces. "You can't be Juliet! She's dead! It's not possible!"

Juliet turned to Lassiter for help. He was frozen in shock. Shawn glared and continued, "I don't know who you are, or how you're doing this, but you can't be Juliet! It's not possible, I saw her die!"

"Shawn," said Juliet quietly, approaching him slowly as a hunter would a frightened deer. She reached forwards and tried to take his hands. He jerked them away, scowling, and she winced. The hurt that flashed across her face was unmistakable.

"It's not possible," he repeated. "You can't be Juliet! I-wait!"

Shawn's hyper-observant and sensitive eyes had seen what everyone else's had not. He grabbed her left hand and brought it to his face, rubbing away the dirt that coated it and pulling something off her finger. He wiped it clean on his shirt and his jaw dropped. A small smile formed on Juliet's face.

Shawn stared at the ring in his hand, then looked at Juliet, then back at the ring.

"I- this- this is- where did you get this?"

"You gave it to me, Shawn. Remember?"

Shawn stared at her as if seeing her for the first time. Yes, he did remember. The moment he had proposed to her, the moment Emily and Zeke had been born, all the memories with Juliet flooded back to him as he beheld the ring. But, for the first time in years, it didn't hurt to think about it. It didn't hurt anymore to remember Juliet, to picture her so clearly in his mind that she could be real, she could be standing right in front of him. But she was. Shawn's lips formed a small smile as he turned the ring over, recognizing the engraving on the back. Finally, he looked up at Juliet, who was smiling- rather nervously, it was true, but there was no mistaking that smile. How could he have ever doubted it? In one fluid movement, he wrapped his arms around her, lifting her off her feet and spinning her around before setting her back on the ground and kissing her. Again, everyone cheered as the two embraced in the middle of the station.

Finally, they both pulled away, and the rest of the police station came to talk to Juliet. Shawn smiled, wrapping one arm around her waist and placing the other on his daughter's shoulder. His family was now complete.

* * *

"You know, Shawn, you should probably keep your eyes on the road," said Juliet from the passenger seat of the car. She gently squeezed his hand and smiled at him.

"Sorry, Jules," he said, turning back to the road. They were going back home- it had been a unanimous vote for Juliet to go home and see how much it had changed- and to catch up with her family. The inevitable statement that they knew she had to give could wait.

"So, why _did _you become a detective?" she asked. Shawn grimaced.

"Let's just say Lassiter threw a fit because all of the partners that he was assigned basically sucked. It wasn't pretty," he said as he remembered it. Truthfully, he didn't blame Lassiter for reacting as he had. None of the cops, not even him, deserved to take Juliet's place.

Juliet shook her head amusedly. "So, you guys are fifteen now?" she asked, turning to the back of the car. Shawn rolled his eyes.

"Jules, you've been asking that same question for the past two hours," he said, smirking at her. She was glad she was already sitting down, for just seeing that familiar smile made her knees go weak. Little did she know that Shawn was thinking the exact same thing.

"Fifteen, huh? Have you started dating yet?"

Shawn, glancing in the rearview mirror, laughed at the expression on their faces. "You'd be surprised," he said, grinning at her. Her eyes narrowed.

"Surprise me," she challenged, trying not to smile as she saw that Zeke's face was going slightly red. Luckily for him, Shawn didn't have a chance to respond because, at that moment, they pulled up to the house. Her eyes widened; it was almost exactly like she had remembered it. She got out of the car, and, dimly registering Shawn's hand on her back, gently guiding her to the door, stared at the house in wonder.

Shawn opened the door and led her inside the house. There had been very few changes to the house, and Juliet wondered if Shawn had intended to keep it that way on purpose, to remember her. She was shaken out of her thoughts, however, when Shawn grinned at her and she felt her heart melt.

"What do you think?" he asked with a knowing smile. She didn't have to reply with words, just wrapped her arms around him and hugged him, conveying her message without speaking. Breathing deeply, she gazed around at the warm furnishings, the smiling kids, and at Shawn himself. Because for the first time in so many years, Juliet Spencer was home.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**Guest: I think this chapter answers your review. :)**

**Ok, so just to make one thing clear: In the scene where Shawn doubts that Juliet is actually Jules when the evidence is right in front of him, no, Shawn does not want Juliet to be dead. He just feels that, if he's wrong, it would be like an insult to her memory. I just wanted to clear that up because, it seemed a little unclear as to whether Shawn actually wants her to die.**

**Oh, and yes, the chapters will be getting a little longer from now on. Please tell me if you want me to break the chapters up, if they are unnaturally long.**

**By the way, I just watched the first hour or so of Psych the Musical, and spent the next hour or so laughing and screaming incoherently. Did anyone else watch it? I won't spoil anything, but I will say this: IT WAS AMAZING!**


	4. The Truth Comes Out

Juliet awoke to a figure hovering over her. Her mind instantly registered it as a man, and she tensed. She felt a pressure on her forehead, and she took deep, heavy breaths, pretending she was still asleep. As soon as the man straightened up again, his hand still caressing her face, she immediately twisted around, yanking her body to the side, and punched him in the face. He gasped in pain as she sat up from her… bed? With a considerable amount of shock, she threw off the blanket covering her and looked around to see her old room, the one she had shared with Shawn. It was just as she remembered it, and for a moment she thought she was hallucinating. Then, the events of the previous day sunk in, and she sat bolt upright to see Shawn, covering his eye in pain.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry, are you okay?" she asked, reaching up to touch the already forming bruise. He grinned deviously at her.

"No, but I think I'm a bit better now." He sat down and wrapped his arms around her, smiling as she leaned into him and stroked his injured cheek. He suddenly straightened up, hearing a tentative knock on the door. Moments later, it swung open to reveal Emily, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Juliet had to fight back tears as the truth of the reality sunk in- for the past six years, she had always been thinking of Emily as her little girl- she had never stopped to really imagine how Emily would change, how much she would grow and accomplish.

"I thought I'd heard something. Dad, what happened to your eye?"

"Nothing," said Shawn, smirking as he squeezed Juliet's hand. He moved over and patted the bed next to her for Emily to sit down, which she did. Juliet gave Emily a small smile, and Emily returned it. Shawn glanced at the two, struggling against tears himself. It was unnerving how much Juliet looked like the wife he remembered, yet a different version of Juliet Spencer. As Juliet and Emily struck up a conversation, Shawn tried to place how exactly she was different. Then it hit him.

The hollow, sunken eyes reflected pain, misery, grief- reflected exactly what she had been through for the past six years. They were different from the bright blue eyes he remembered, full of the energy and life that he had grown accustomed to. These eyes were even more beautiful- still kind and loving, but also filled with sadness: whenever he looked at them, he wanted to cry. These eyes were a constant reminder of how he had failed to find her, to save her when she had most needed help. Because, how many times had Juliet and Lassiter run through the door, guns blazing as they apprehended the perpetrator that had just been about to shoot him or Gus? Too many times. And here he was, enjoying his life and freedom as she struggled to deal with all the terrors she had been facing for the past six years. Yes, terrors. Shawn didn't need to know how she had been imprisoned by a man who thought he'd loved her, who'd tortured her both physically and verbally, with taunts of how she'd never see her family again. He didn't need to know how she spent the nights sobbing, lying against the cold, hard ground as she tried to envision Shawn coming to save her. Shawn didn't need to know any of these things to realize that Juliet was different now. But she was. And there was nothing he could do about it.

"Dad? Hello?"

Emily waved a hand in front of his face. "Earth to dad," she continued, as Juliet smiled. "What?" he asked, shaken from his thoughts. Juliet reassuringly squeezed his hand, as if she knew what he was thinking about- which she probably did, seeing as she knew him so well. Shawn squeezed back, and with that, a silence fell over the small family.

"So, what do we do now?" asked Emily. It was a rhetorical question, intended to bring her parents to the inevitable reality of the present, but Shawn answered anyway.

"Well, for starters, how 'bout we have some breakfast?"

As the astonished but smiling Juliet watched Shawn wake the other kids, she realized something. Shawn seemed somehow different, not the same person he had been before. After a few minutes, it hit her. The depressed, haunted, guilty look in his eyes told her that he had never truly moved on. He looked different from the Shawn she remembered, the Shawn with the playful hazel eyes that were always full of humor, yet somehow managed to convey a deeper emotion. All that was gone now, was replaced by a serious Shawn who valued life, and no longer took it as lightly as he had before. Juliet didn't need to know how he, who had always been the one to support their family, and to comfort them when they needed it, had sentenced himself to bed, had forced the others to help him get through the tragedy and help him pick up the pieces of his shattered life. She didn't need to know how he, after finding his phone again and listening to the call he had missed on his birthday that went to voicemail, had tried to commit suicide, and would have succeeded if Emily and Zeke hadn't found the pieces of glass in his desk, already stained with blood, and called Gus and Henry, who had helped Shawn through it. She didn't need to know any of these things to know that Shawn was different now. But he was. And there was nothing she could do about it.

"You okay?" he asked as he slid a plate of pancakes in front of her. Startled out of her thoughts, she glanced at him in surprise as he sat next to her and placed a gentle hand on her back. "Eat," he urged. Both of them smiled as she obliged and ate the delicious food. Shawn slowly rubbed her back and wished that the moment could last forever, him with his family, eating breakfast like an ordinary family. Such a normal thing had been ripped from the Spencers six years ago. He wished that he could stay there, in their comfortable home, with Juliet at one side and his kids at each other. But the world didn't work that way.

_Ring! Ring!_

Shawn picked up his phone. It no longer had 'Psych' written on the back- he had traded it for a simpler, plain black case after he'd quit Psych and become a detective.

"Spencer," he said in an unusually amiable and cheerful voice. "Yeah… Okay… We'll be right there." The cheerful tone of his voice was gone now, replaced by a more steely resolve.

Everyone glanced at him. "We?" prompted Juliet. He sighed, running his free hand through his hair.

"They want to take your statement."

* * *

Juliet felt a strange sense of déjà vu as she walked through the door of the police station, Shawn by her side. But this time she wasn't thought to be impersonating anyone else, this time the kids weren't there, this time, it was much more terrifying. They walked into the interrogation room, and Shawn and Carlton sat across from her.

"So… What exactly happened?" started Shawn. Lassiter glanced at him, as he was usually the first to talk when interrogating someone, but nevertheless Lassiter continued, "Start from the beginning. Don't leave anything out."

She took a deep breath. Shawn reached across the table to take her hand, and she accepted it, squeezing it tightly as if it could take away the pain and the misery of all she had been through.

"Well, I had just called Shawn and was driving to the crime scene with you, Carlton, when they started shooting at us, and, well, you know what happened,"

Both Shawn and Lassiter shuddered. They did know what happened, relived it almost every night in their dreams.

"I think I passed out after that, he must have knocked me unconscious, but the next thing I knew, I was in this really dark room, chained to the wall. I could walk around a little bit, but other than that, I was basically trapped. And then, every night, he would come, and just talk to me. I don't know what his name was, or what he looked like, or anything about him, really, but all I know is that we went to college together, years back, and he loved me, but when I started going out with Scott, he swore he would take revenge."

She paused and glanced at Shawn to see his reaction. Shawn's expression was neutral, but after years of being with him, she could easily read his emotions. She knew that he was bursting with rage, wanting to kill the man who had imprisoned her for all those years. Shawn looked up from the spot where he had been staring stonily at the table and met her eyes. He motioned for her to keep going.

"So he came to me, every night, and-and he had this crazy idea that, if he spent as much time around me as possible, I might like him, or something. I don't know what his motive was, but sometimes he would just start talking about you guys, about my family. Once he said that you had died, Shawn. The next day, he told me it wasn't true, but the horrible thing was, I believed him." Tears started to form in her eyes as she recalled the memories of what had happened.

"And, some days, he- he would do more than talk. He would-" Juliet never managed to complete her sentence, for at that moment, she burst into tears. Shawn and Lassiter exchanged a quick look before rushing to her side. Shawn pulled her into a hug and gently stroked her hair as she sobbed into his chest. "It's okay," he whispered in her ear. "It's over now." After a while, the tears subsided, and Shawn gently guided her to the door.

"We can finish tomorrow," he said to Lassiter, who was only too happy to agree.

"Keep her safe," was the only remark he made, and with that, the two detectives and former detective walked out of the interrogation room.

"Are you all right?" he asked. She had been incredibly quiet throughout the entire ride home, and he had been at a loss for words. Seeing his strong-willed wife break down like that was another shock to him, and he now wanted to kill the man more than ever. But before he could, he had to get more information from Juliet. He had to convince her to tell him what had happened; he knew how hard it would be to relive her worst experiences all over again. And that could happen only when she had healed.

She glanced away from the window and toward him. With a pang of guilt, he realized how red her eyes were. He reached out to take her hand.

"You know, there's this place with really awesome smoothies. You want to get some before we go home?"

She looked gratefully at him. How did he know her so well? The last thing she needed was for the kids to be asking how it had gone. She needed time to compose herself, and, though he didn't show it, she knew he did too.

"That sounds great," she replied. He smiled at her and rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb, turning the car around and driving to the new store that sold the best smoothies in Santa Barbara. A few minutes later, they were both sipping smoothies (Shawn got pineapple, Juliet got strawberry, just like old times) and were sitting across from each other at a table when Shawn decided to try again.

"So, Jules, do you want to talk about what happened? I mean, it's okay if you don't want to yet, but-"

"Look, Shawn, I know you want to know what happened, but can we please just not talk about it right now?"

"Okay," he conceded. She smiled gratefully at him.

"You never got to answer my question about if they've started dating or not," she prompted, wanting to change the subject. He grinned.

"Well, Emily hasn't reached that milestone in her life, but you'll never guess who Zeke is going out with."

She blinked. "Who?" she asked. After being gone for six years, she didn't know many of his current friends from school.

"Sarah."

"Sarah _Lassiter_? That Sarah? You're kidding, right?" she asked incredulously.

"Nope," he said gleefully. "Lassie almost threw a fit."

He surprised himself, by calling his partner Lassie. He had stopped doing that after Juliet had left, after he had become Lassiter's partner. Suddenly, someone burst through the door.

"Gus!" said Shawn, smiling as he saw his best friend hurtle through the doors of the smoothie place. That smile quickly faded as he saw the expression on Gus's face.

"Shawn, how could you not tell me she was here?! I had to find out from _Lassiter_! And I thought he was kidding, too! Lassiter _never_ kids!"

Gus tackled Juliet in a hug. She smiled, hugging him back. "It's great to see you, Gus," she said when he pulled away, but Gus wasn't looking at her.

"How could you not tell me this? And don't tell me you forgot," he admonished when Shawn opened his mouth to retaliate.

"Sorry, buddy," he said. "It was just really chaotic yesterday, and I never really got time to tell you."

"You never got time?! Really, Shawn? A text would have sufficed, like, 'Hey, Gus, my long lost wife who's been missing for six years just returned from the dead!'"

"Whoa, there, calm down, Gus." said Shawn. Juliet tried to hide a smile behind her hand as she watched the two bicker. It almost felt like nothing had happened. Finally, as Gus's protests started to subside and the people around them stopped staring, Gus pulled up a chair next to them. The three of them talked for a while, heedless of time, for they were lost in their own world of the joy of being back together.

* * *

Juliet and Shawn lay side-by-side on the warm mattress, their arms wrapped around each other and both of them fast asleep. It had been a long day for both of them. Suddenly, Juliet gasped and sat up, her heart pounding and her eyes filled with unshed tears. Shawn opened his eyes and sat up as well, knowing immediately that something was wrong. He saw her look around, confused as to their surroundings, then her eyes met Shawn's and she remembered where she was. He had barely enough time to glance at the alarm clock next to him to read the time- 2:34 am- before she tackled him with a hug, burying her face in his chest and trying not to cry.

"Jules! W-What's wrong?" he asked, though he already knew the answer. She wasn't the only one to wake up in the middle of the night because of a nightmare. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead as she sobbed for the second time in as many days.

"I-It's nothing," she said when she had calmed down. "Just a bad dream."

Shawn frowned. If he had learned anything from her kidnapping, it was to never keep his feelings and emotions in. The last time that had happened, well… The scars on his wrists weren't just there by accident. He stroked her hair gently.

"You can tell me anything, you know," he reminded her. "You want to talk about it?"

She gave a small nod, then straightened up.

"It-It was about the guy, who kidnapped me. He told me you were dead, Shawn." Shawn held her as she started to cry again, the rest of her sentence giving way to incoherent sobs. He pulled her closer, letting her curl up on his lap and rest her head against his shoulder. He remembered something she had said earlier. _'He would do more than talk.' _He frowned again, thinking he knew what had happened, but not wanting to say it out loud. Shawn felt her chest heave against his as she sobbed, answering his unspoken question.

"Shawn, he-he raped me."

"He _what_?!" Shawn almost yelled, pulling away to rest his hands tenderly on her shoulders and look into her blue, tear-filled eyes. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and continued, "Th-the first time he tried, I punched him."

He nodded, squeezing her shoulders appreciatively.

"He-He went away after that, and I thought he wouldn't try again, but…" She let a few more tears fall before continuing.

"The next day, he came back, and," she paused again, and Shawn waited patiently, pulling her close again and letting her bury her face in his shirt.

"He handcuffed me to the wall. I-I couldn't do anything, he kept coming back, night after night, and… After a while, I figured out that it was better to not fight back. Once, I tried to kick him, but he was ready for it."

Shawn watched in horror as she pulled her shirt- his T-shirt, actually- to the side and displayed the long scar that extended from her shoulder to her arm. "It was with a knife," she said, indicating the wound that, physically, had long since healed, but carried all the memories of her torture with it. Shawn reached out and gently brushed his fingers against it, unable to do anything more. Then, in a soft voice, trying to mask the burning curiosity inside him, he asked, "Why didn't he just kill you?"

"I told you, a-apparently, he loved me, and his first plan was to kill me, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. So he just pretended to kill me."

"How did you get out?"

Juliet sighed and wiped her eyes again. "It was one night, after he, well, you know…"

He nodded, motioning for her to continue. With a loud sniff, she said, "That was the day he told me you were dead. I-I was ready to give up, Shawn, I had no hope left. I just wanted it to end. But I couldn't end it, I spent the whole night crying, and then, the next night he told me you were actually alive, that was when I wanted to get out. I just couldn't take it any longer, it was basically escape or death. So that night, I was really determined.

"So when he was about to handcuff me to the wall again the next night, I pretended to trip, and he tried to pull me back up, but I punched him in the face and grabbed his knife. And I-I stabbed him. Not fatally, just in the shoulder, but it was enough to make him let me go. I ran away, and he ran after me, but somehow I managed to lose him.

"When I realized that I was still at Santa Barbara, I wasn't sure if you had moved, or something, and I honestly didn't want to find out. But then, I saw a newspaper, and I realized what date it was. It was the anniversary of the day I was kidnapped, and I knew that even if you had moved, you would have to be at my grave.

"Before, he had told me where the grave was, and he even recorded the funeral for me to watch. For the first month or so, he kept me posted on everything that you did, until he got bored of it. But anyways, I knew where the grave was, so I went there and I waited for you. I don't know why I didn't go to the station, but I just knew that I had to see you first. And, well, you know the rest."

Shawn stared at her. He was still stroking the scar on her arm, too surprised to do anything else. Shawn felt a cold rage pass over him, reaching deep into his heart.

"I love you, Jules," he finally said in a hoarse, choked voice, pulling her into his arms again. "Love you too," she whispered into his chest. For the first time, he registered the hot tears that soaked the front of his shirt, and recognized all the pain it represented, the torture and the misery. He rested his forehead on her soft blonde hair, a tear trickling down his cheek as well. He could have found her, he could have saved her, but he hadn't. How could he have been so stupid? Sensing his thoughts, as only Juliet Spencer could, Juliet straightened up again and looked him in the eye.

"Shawn… It's not your fault. Don't go blaming yourself for something you didn't do."

He sighed again and nodded, leaning forward to kiss her forehead. "Let's just go back to sleep," he said, earning a small, tentative smile in return. He pulled her against him, and closed his eyes, trying to fall asleep and rid his mind of the anger that had overwhelmed him. He felt Juliet shift against him, her head on his arm, and he smiled. It had been a long day for both of them.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**THAT BASTARD! YOU LITTLE (censored)**

**Okay, this chapter certainly did not go where I expected it to. Oh well, more hate for the mysterious man who kidnapped Jules!**

**So this chapter was a little hard to write. As a middle schooler, I'm still not very comfortable with writing about stuff like this, but I wanted to go a little outside my comfort zone to make this as deep as I thought it should be. And yes, Shawn does cut himself. I'm not sure if anyone caught the foreshadowing in the last chapter, "the wounds he inflicted upon himself" but, yes, the suicidal thought will come into play a little later (next chapter).**

**Please review! Reviews mean the world to me, and if I get more reviews, I might be persuaded to post chapters a little more frequently *hint hint*. And for those of you who think this is blackmail, well, it is, so, as many of the Psych characters would say, SUCK IT! :)**

**Merry Christmas, for my readers out there who celebrate Christmas! Speaking of Christmas...**

**I'm hopefully going get time to post a holiday fic in my series of shules oneshots (btw, if you like this, you should check that and my other two existing oneshots [First Kiss and Shock] out. I've only posted one chapter so far, but I have plenty of ideas, so if people like it I'll post more), so stay tuned!**


	5. He did what, now?

"Not to be rude or anything, but both of you look terrible," announced Gus to Juliet and Shawn. He shrugged, smiling, and wrapped an arm around her waist, trying to act normal. Gus saw right through it. He could see the anger in his best friend's abnormally red eyes, could tell how Shawn was tapping his foot almost impatiently against the ground, how he drew Juliet to him protectively as if, if he let go, she would never come back. Gus frowned.

"Are you guys all right?" he asked. Juliet, smiling as well, said something back, but Gus wasn't paying attention. Gus had known both of them for a long time, and he could easily tell that something wasn't right. Something had happened last night, and he was going to find out just what it was.

"Gus? Are you there?" Juliet waved her hand in front of his face. He blinked.

"What? Oh, yeah… Just, um… Thinking about something."

She seemed to understand, for she didn't press on.

"So… We have to go back to the station today, for Jules to give her statement." said Shawn. "Jules and I wanted you to watch it, because we thought it'd only be fair for you to know what's happening."

Gus frowned again. "Are you sure?" he asked. Juliet smiled and nodded, feeling Shawn gently rub her back, giving her comfort and strength. Shawn was surprised at how brave she was; he knew what it was like to have to recount his worst experiences, his worst fears and memories. And to talk about it in front of all her loved ones was, well… Unthinkable. By the look in his best friend's face, Gus as well knew that this was not to be taken lightly, that Juliet had undergone what had possibly been the worst form of torture ever known to mankind- not just physical, but mental as well. It was obvious that the kidnapper had not only tortured her, but had screwed with her mind as well. So Gus smiled reassuringly at the couple, and five minutes later, Shawn and Juliet were sitting in the back seat of the Blueberry, smiling and holding each other's hands.

* * *

Gus shivered as he watched Juliet recount her worst memories. He felt a tear slowly roll down his cheek as Juliet talked. Beside him, Chief Vick put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Gus, are you all right?" she asked. He nodded, gesturing to his eyes and explaining, "Sympathetic crier."

She didn't seem convinced. Through the window of the interrogation room, they saw Juliet holding Shawn's hand so tightly they were sure that his blood circulation was being cut off. They saw the tears running freely down her face as she spoke. As the horrible truth sunk in, and the realization dawned on them, they knew that, while Juliet had been brought back to them still as Juliet Spencer, she was a different Juliet Spencer, a shattered Juliet Spencer, a broken Juliet Spencer.

Finally, the interrogation was over, and Shawn led her out of the room. He was still holding her tightly, and Gus thought he knew what had happened last night. He felt the same rage that Shawn had felt the night before course through every fiber of his being, and he knew that what this man had done was unforgivable. Glancing around him, he saw that a few of the cops around him who had come to watch the interrogation felt the same. With almost all of the entire Santa Barbara Police Department after him, that man would pay for his crimes. Gus knew it.

* * *

Juliet sat next to Shawn on the couch, her head resting on his shoulder. He had, wanting to take her mind off everything that had happened, insisted that they watch a movie. Juliet had been only too happy to agree. The kids were at Henry's house- after Shawn had explained the whole story to him, he had agreed to let them visit, because both of them had known that Juliet would not have the emotional capacity to talk to them after what she had been forced to recount at the station. They were now cuddled up on the couch together, watching a Harry Potter movie- she forgot which one- because, for some strange reason, Emily was obsessed with the series. Juliet felt him reach around her to take handful of popcorn from the bowl on her lap. Suddenly, she saw something and grabbed his wrist, noticing how he flinched as she did so.

"Shawn? What is this?" she asked somewhat nervously, lightly touching each long, deep scar on his wrist. He glanced away, avoiding her gaze.

"Um… I cut my hand on a fence somewhere. It's not very important. Hey, look, Harry just jumped over the dragon," he said with a feeble attempt at redirecting the conversation. She frowned.

"Shawn, don't you dare lie to me. I was a detective, I know how these scars look. What. Happened?"

He sighed, remembering the horrible day it had happened.

_He had just gotten back home at around midnight, when he realized that, he had not checked his phone for the entire day. _Stupid! _he cursed himself. _What if her kidnapper had left a message for him?

_Shawn picked up his phone and felt his heart leap as he read:_

**1 Missed Call:**

**Juliet O'Hara**

_He slowly listened to the voicemail, his heart slowly sinking to the ground._

_"Hey, Shawn, Carlton and I will probably be back soon, so-" her pleasant voice was cut off by Lassiter swearing, and he heard the sound of metal against metal, heard Juliet's scream as a car smashed into theirs._

_"O'HARA!" he heard Lassiter yell. "Why the hell can't I see anything? O'HARA!"_

_"Carlton!" came her desperate scream. Lassiter swore again._

_"This is Detective Lassiter, requesting back-" He was interrupted by Juliet screaming again. Suddenly, there was the sound of a heavy blow. And the phone was cut off._

_Shawn swore. He kicked the coffee table so hard that a glass flew off of it, smashing against the wall. Shawn barely noticed. All he knew was that, if he hadn't been so busy having fun with his family, he could have prevented her death. He swore again, dropping the phone and collapsing onto the couch, his head buried in his hands. The grief that overwhelmed him was unbearable, so he did the only thing that he knew would help. He got up, walked over to the kitchen, and grabbed a bottle of the first thing he could see. He didn't even bother to check what it was, just opened the bottle and downed it in one gulp. _

_The alcohol was slowly consuming his brain, clouding his thoughts and making his vision hazy. Juliet's frantic scream was still ringing in his ears, the whole message replaying in his mind over and over and over again. He stood up and flung the bottle at the wall, reveling in the sound of the glass shattering, for it drowned out the sound of her screams. _

_Shawn closed his eyes, breathing hard, and felt something hot and sticky run down his leg. One of the pieces of glass had ricocheted off the wall and had hit him. Shawn didn't even feel the pain, but he wished he did. Hell, he deserved the pain, for being so stupid. The pain he was going through then was nothing compared to the pain Juliet must have been feeling when the kidnapper had shot her, had killed her, had- No! He couldn't think about it. Shawn picked up another shard of glass. His hands were moving without him telling them to, and he knew that the alcohol was influencing his mind, but he didn't care. _

_Shawn fought back a scream as the glass pierced his wrist. It wasn't a scream of pain, not even of rage, but of anguish. He cut himself again, several times, before he came back to his senses and dropped the glass. Shawn watched the object fall to the ground, drops of his blood falling with it, and swore again. He wouldn't be able to find Juliet's killer if he was so weak that he couldn't even fight himself. _

_He quickly cleaned the room, dropping the bloodstained glass into the trash can and bandaging the cuts. Silently, he swore to himself that he would never let this happen again._

* * *

_But it did happen again. That night, he had a nightmare that Juliet was still tied to the chair, still struggling against her bonds with a desperate, frantic look in her eyes. But instead of the kidnapper advancing towards her, it was someone else. Someone he knew as well as the back of his hand, or even Juliet's hand. It was Shawn. He had killed her, had shot her in front of all his family and friends. _And wasn't it true, _he thought to himself when he woke up that night with sweat dripping from his body and her name on his lips, _that it was his fault that Juliet had died. He could have stopped it, he could have been there for her, but he had been selfish, and because of it, Juliet, the love of his life, was dead.

_Shawn had run into the bathroom, trying to stop the memories of her kidnap from flooding his brain, but failing. Grabbing his razor from the counter, he had smashed it against the cold, hard tiles, breaking it. Shawn pushed it against his skin again, feeling the cold metal against his blood and watching the bright red liquid spatter against the sink. He sunk to his knees, feeling tears pour down his face._

* * *

_The next few days had gone similarly, with Shawn frantically searching for leads and working with Lassiter during the day, and him refusing to fall asleep due to the terrors sleep would bring, then eventually cutting himself when he succumbed. The only difference was that now the kids were there: having wanted some time alone to go over everything that had happened in the last few days and to mentally search for any clue that could help him find her killer, Shawn had convinced Gus to let the kids stay at his place for the night. Shawn had to be extra quiet and careful after that- he didn't want to worry them any more than they already had to go through._

_After about a week of the same torture, Emily and Zeke had noticed that something was off with their father. And when Zeke, who was the most observant of the three kids, saw the bandages on his father's arms, and put two and two together, he knew that they had to do something. One day, when Shawn wasn't home, Zeke and Emily searched through their father's drawers, only to find shards of bloodstained glass. Together, they had told Gus and Henry about the situation. Shawn had undergone therapy, but surprisingly, in the end, it was two unexpected people that helped Shawn the most. Carlton Lassiter, to whom Juliet was like a sister, and Henry Spencer, who knew all about the loss of a loved one- maybe Maddie hadn't died, but their divorce had still torn him apart. But Shawn healed, and soon, the family had almost forgotten that anything had ever happened._

"Did you ever cut yourself after that?"

Shawn looked up and shook his head. He had been staring stonily at the table the whole time he talked, and Juliet hadn't interrupted him since he had started his story. Shawn wasn't very surprised to see that there were silent tears pouring down Juliet's face. He reached out to hug her, to wipe away the tears, but she pulled away, blinking the tears from her eyes so that she could see him better.

"Sh-Shawn, are you insane?!" she practically yelled. He blinked. This was not the reaction he had been expecting.

"You tried to c-commit suicide because you thought I was dead? Even when you had three children who thought they had just lost their mother to take care of? Even when you had friends and family who loved you and didn't want to give up on you? You would just leave them all behind?"

This was the first time he seen her get angry at him since she had come back.

"Jules, I-I didn't-"

But she cut him off.

"Shawn, how could you be so selfish? Wh-What if I had come back to find out th-that what he had said was actually true? What if I had come back to find out that you were dead?"

He blinked again, taking a deep breath.

"Jules, you have to understand. I-I thought you were dead! I mean, what would you have done if you had found out that _I _was dead? Would you have just shaken it off and have said, 'Oh well, it's no big deal. There are plenty more fish in the sea, right?'"

Now it was Juliet's turn to be shocked. She gaped at him, then recovered quickly and retaliated, "Well, maybe I wouldn't move on so quickly, but I sure as hell wouldn't abandon my family!"

"Speaking of abandoning families… Who's the one who went missing for _six years_? Who's the one who forced everyone to grieve for her, to think she was dead, for all that time?"

She stared at him, stunned into silence.

"So it's my fault that I was kidnapped?"

The inevitable question had come with less venom that he had anticipated. She looked down at the floor, tears pooling in her eyes.

"Juliet, I-"

She cut him off again.

"How exactly is it my fault, Shawn?" she asked in a soft voice. "Because I was too weak to escape, or is it because-"

"No, Jules, it's nothing like that. It's just… Why is it that everyone has to fall in love with you?"

She looked up at him, surprised. It was not what she had been expecting. He reached out to take both of her hands in his.

"I'm serious, Jules," he said, stroking the backs of her hands with his thumb. "Is it just because you're so beautiful, or because you're so… So…" He struggled to find a word. "Good," he finished finally. She raised an eyebrow.

"I mean, you just came back from the dead, and instead of worrying about yourself, or complaining about how different it is, or anything, here you are yelling at me about how I almost left our kids. Putting their safety in front of yours... That's one of the reasons I fell in love with you in the first place, you know. You would always go out of your way to help people. Well, I mean, that's your job, I guess, being a cop, but still... And, Jules, I know I was being selfish, and I was abandoning them, but, well, the only thing I could think of was you. Don't get me wrong, I love all of them just as much as you, but you, well... You weren't _just_ my soul mate. You were like Gus, you were my partner, not in solving crimes, but in taking care of the kids, in settling their fights, in balancing out the family. I didn't think I would be able to do it on my own. I was only thinking of us, and I was being stupid. So, please, forgive me, and I promise that I won't do anything like it again. I love all of you, and I wouldn't lose you for anything." he said, still not breaking eye contact with her. She reached out to wipe away a tear that he hadn't realized he'd been crying.

"Funny how this is turning out kind of like Romeo and Juliet, right? I think that Juliet's dead, so then I try to kill myself, and then you come back... I always knew I was your Romeo," said Shawn. Juliet sighed, feeling a small, surprised smile tugging at the corners of her lips. Why was it that Shawn could always make her smile, even at a time like this?

"I just don't want to lose you," she said, her voice breaking at the end of the sentence.

He pulled her into a hug, and she let the smell of his Axe deodorant soothe her. She closed her eyes, feeling a tear run down her cheek. She wasn't sure whether it was his tear or hers, but she didn't really care anymore.

"Let's just forget about it, okay? It's all right now, I'm safe, and so are you, and so are the kids. Everything's okay now."

She nodded. The latest Harry Potter movie forgotten, Juliet sat on the couch, in his embrace, feeling the smallest of smiles spread over her face. It was going to be okay. Nothing would happen to them; they were a family once again. And both of them would do anything in their power to stop that from changing. But then, life was a mysterious thing. Anything could happen. For example,

"Jules?"

"Yeah?" she asked somewhat nervously as he pulled away from her.

"I bet I can catch this piece of popcorn in my mouth," he said with a grin. She smiled back, relieved. Maybe the Spencers had already fulfilled their quota of bad luck.

"You're on."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**So I'm sorry I didn't get this chapter posted as soon as I thought it'd be, but anyway... To the replies!**

**MaggieJaggie: Thank you so much for reviewing! A few words can make such a difference! I'm really glad that you think this story is good. Like, REALLY REALLY glad. So glad that I could give you a thousand virtual pineapples. That's how glad I am.**

**Cap R. Man: Thank you for reviewing as well, it really means a lot! And THANK YOU for telling me that the chapter was well written- it was, to say the least, a bit awkward writing about this, because I'm not used to writing about stuff like this and DEFINITELY not used to talking about it, but, as cliche as it sounds, when you reviewed, all my insecurities simply vanished! If that makes sense...**

**Guest: SO sorry I didn't see this review in time to reply to it in my last chapter, but anyway... Thank you for the constructive criticism- if there's anything I like more than people telling me they like my stories, it's constructive criticism. So thank you for that. I agree that Juliet should've been a little more surprised when she saw her kids, that is a very good point. I will try to address it in this story by having some more "mother-daughter/son bonding time".**

**I'm sure you all are very, very tired of hearing me say this, but THANK YOU ALL for reviewing, and thank you to anyone who is reading this story. Reviews make me VERY VERY happy. They might even make me post faster, *hint hint*...**


	6. Together Again

"I don't understand it!"

Shawn paced in front of Chief Vick's desk, his brain hard at work as he puzzled over the quandary at hand.

"You're sure you checked the entire block?" asked Lassiter.

"We checked everything in a three-mile radius of where Juliet was kidnapped." answered Chief Vick patiently, for what seemed to her like the twentieth time that day.

Shawn frowned. "How could he have done it? Vanished without a trace!"

The three of them were inside Chief Vick's office, discussing where Juliet's kidnapper could have gone- Juliet had been able to give them a somewhat accurate description of where she had been taken to, but when the cops had searched there, they had found nothing but-

"An old, abandoned warehouse, on the corner of Maple and Olive. No prints, no blood, no nothing." Chief Vick placed her head in her hands.

"He couldn't have done all that in one day, could he?" asked Shawn, looking to the others for assurance. Lassiter shook his head, frowning at Chief Vick, who just shrugged, at a loss.

"This guy must be really good," said Lassiter. Shawn nodded.

"Well, detectives, this case is still our top priority, but seeing as we have nothing… Why don't both of you go home, take the day off. Shawn, you can try to see if Juliet can tell us anything more-"

"She won't," said Shawn glumly. "I tried, she said what she told us yesterday was all she remembered."

Chief Vick frowned sympathetically.

"Nevertheless, I'm sure she would like some support, Shawn. It was a very traumatic experience for her, and it will probably take a while for her to get used to the idea that she's back."

Shawn and Lassiter nodded.

"But if she remembers _anything_, call me immediately. I want this son of a bitch nailed down as soon as possible."

They nodded again and left the room. As soon as Lassiter shut the door, Shawn turned on him.

"How could he have just vanished?"

Lassiter shrugged. "Maybe he wasn't working alone,"he said. Shawn shook his head.

"I asked Juliet about that, and she said that there was no way he could have had a partner, she would have known about it."

"How would she know?"

"Well, you know how this guy lo- really liked her, right?" Shawn winced at the word 'loved', not quite ready to believe that.

Lassiter nodded.

"Juliet said that he really opened himself up to her. She practically knew everything about him. All but his name and face."

He nodded again. During the interrogation, Juliet had explained that she had never seen his face- he was always wearing a ski mask, because if she had seen his face, she would have likely remembered him from college.

"Why don't we pull up the records of all the guys who were in her college," Lassiter suggested. "Juliet said that he was white, about six-foot-three, and had a tattoo on his left ankle. That narrows it down."

Shawn quickly agreed, and so the two found themselves immersed in trying to figure out who the man was.

* * *

"There are so many," groaned Shawn, leaning back in his chair. Across the room, Lassiter had a similar expression. Shawn crossed over to his desk.

"What do you have?"

"At least a hundred people fit that description," said Lassiter. "There has to be something else we can go on!"

"Juliet said that that was all she could remember."

"Well then, maybe she should remember more!" Lassiter growled angrily.

"Carlton, I know you're angry, but don't take it out on me!"

Lassiter sighed. "What else are we supposed to do?"

Shawn shrugged helplessly. "I think I'm going to take Chief's advice and go home. This is way too much to handle at the moment."

Lassiter nodded. "Tell Juliet I said hi," he said agreeably. Shawn gave him a weak smile, but Lassiter didn't notice. His mind was too busy working on how the man could have just vanished. _Vanished…_

* * *

"What happened?" asked Juliet, a concerned expression on her face as she regarded her tired husband who had just walked through the door.

He shook his head and sunk onto the couch. "Nothing," he muttered. She frowned, trying to decipher the comment, and moved to sit next to him.

"What do you mean? You didn't find _anything_?"

Shawn nodded, laying his head on her shoulder and wrapping one arm around her waist.

"No prints, we tried looking for him with the description that you'd gave us, from your college records, but we couldn't narrow down a suspect."

She sighed and hugged him. He buried his face against her, feeling tears come to his eyes.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. Her eyes widened.

"Shawn, it's not your fault! The entire police station was searching for him for six years, and they couldn't find him. You couldn't just find him in a single day, he's too smart for that."

Shawn shook his head. "I'm not talking about that. I'm sorry that we didn't find you, that we stopped searching for you after a few years, and-"

"Shawn! We've been over this! Don't blame yourself for what happened. You couldn't stop it, no one could."

She winced slightly as his fingers found the scar on her shoulder. "I could have stopped this. If I had been with you then, I would have noticed the other car, I could have saved you!" Tears were flowing freely down his cheeks, falling onto her shoulders, and it was all she could do to keep from crying herself. As it was, though, her voice still shook slightly as she replied, "No, Shawn, you couldn't have. He was too smart for that. He would have picked another time when you weren't with me. He'd probably been planning it for, well… Years, maybe. It's not your fault."

He held her tightly then, trying to stem the flow of his tears, and she could feel how tense he was, how much her kidnapping had affected him.

"Turn around, Shawn," she ordered. He frowned, pulling away from her to give her a confused expression. She gently took his arms, turning him away from her, then reached under his shirt to pull it off of his back.

"Did I mention how handsome you look in your detective outfit?" she whispered in his ear. A small smile pulled at the corners of his lips- which was exactly what she had intended.

She squeezed his shoulders lightly, her hands moving down his muscled back. When had he become so strong? She hadn't noticed the change before, but now it was clearly obvious. Shawn had changed physically as well.

He sighed and leaned into her as she continued the gentle massage, her fingers flexing up and down his back and shoulders. She rested her chin on his shoulder, pressing her cheek against his.

"I never thought I would be able to do this again," she murmured under her breath. He didn't react except to reach behind him and take her hands in his, squeezing them gently. "I know," he whispered back, his voice so soft she almost couldn't hear it.

She pressed her hand to the scars on his wrist. "So much has changed," she whispered, a tear trickling down her cheek and falling onto his neck. He nodded and turned around to face her, reaching up to wipe the tear from her face.

"Except for one thing," he replied, his arms moving to settle around her waist. She raised an eyebrow.

"I still love you," he said, his voice impossibly soft.

"I love you too," she murmured back under her breath. The words felt strange on her lips, but along with it came a sense of ease, of comfort, and she knew that she was doing the right thing. She pulled his body more tightly against hers, resting her cheek on his chest.

"What time do the kids get back from school?" she asked, not so subtly changing the subject. He grinned, pulling away to face her.

"You forgot already?" he asked, his eyes widening in mock astonishment. "And I thought you were smart, too!"

She playfully hit his bare chest, smiling as well. "If you thought that, then maybe your observational skills are wearing off, Detective."

"But I do think you're smart. And beautiful. And caring. And awesome. And-"

"Shawn!" she said, an unmistakable heat rising to her cheeks. His grin widened.

"Not to mention that you look adorable when you blush." Which only made her blush even more. She rolled her eyes.

"Seriously, though, when do they get back?"

"In about two hours. Leaving us enough time to do whatever we want."

She smiled. "That's good," she said, laying her head on his chest.

"So, a new episode of Phineas and Ferb just came out a few days ago."

Her smile widened.

"Sounds great!" she said, jumping up to grab the remote. He grinned and stood up, quickly leaning in to kiss her cheek.

"I'll make the popcorn," he announced, reaching down to pick up his shirt. Juliet stopped him, placing her hands on his chest.

"You can leave it off," she suggested, her fingers lightly tracing over his chest. He grinned and dropped the shirt, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her. She smiled as her hands automatically moved to his neck. Maybe the popcorn could wait.

* * *

"Mom?"

Juliet jumped and turned around. It was still surprising for her to be called 'Mom' after six years. Emily smiled at her, looking slightly embarrassed. It had been a week since her kidnapping, and they still hadn't gotten any other clues about who her mysterious kidnapper could be.

"Can I, um, ask your advice about something?"

Juliet smiled, already knowing what it was about.

"Boy trouble?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. Emily blushed, causing Juliet's smile to widen.

"Let's sit down," she said to her daughter.

* * *

"So, you like this Luke boy, but you're not sure if he likes you?"

"Er… Yeah, pretty much."

Juliet tried to fight a smile from her face. It was hard to believe that, after everything that had happened, something so natural and common could be happening.

"Well, first of all, don't tell your father."

Emily frowned, confused. Juliet smiled.

"Knowing Shawn, he's probably going to demand to see Luke the moment you tell him."

"How do you know?" asked Emily.

"Well, first of all, he's very protective of you. And secondly, a few days ago he said, and I quote, 'If I find out that Emily is secretly dating someone, the first thing I'll do is run a background check on him. The second thing I'll do is make sure that he is smart, nice, and good enough for her. And the third thing I'll do is make sure he likes pineapple.'"

Emily laughed. "That sounds like him."

"Yeah… And you really don't want to hear his romantic advice." She chuckled at the thought of what Shawn would say. Emily raised an eyebrow.

"He did get married," Emily said. Juliet smiled.

"After chasing me for about six years, yes. But anyways, let's get back to your predicament. Why don't you tell me more about him?"

Emily smiled. "Well, he's smart, nice, and good. He's kind of quiet, but he loves answering questions. And he's really cute, too," she added as an afterthought. Juliet smiled again.

"Well, why don't you think he likes you?"

Emily shrugged. "He knows who I am, but we're not really friends or anything."

Juliet smiled. "Emily, the first thing you should do is become friends with him. Get to know him well, and then he'll see how much of a smart, caring, and awesome girl you are, and he'll like you too."

Emily frowned. "Really?"

"Of course! That was the same tactic that your father used on me, too. Although don't annoy his friends, flirt unnecessarily with him, or ditch him when his partner forces paperwork on him. That can kind of set back the process a few years."

Emily looked at her mother, amused. "I'm not so sure that the last one applies."

Juliet smiled. "No, I guess it doesn't. But I'm sure he'll like you if you make friends with him."

Emily smiled back. "Thanks, mom!" she said, jumping up and sprinting to her room. Juliet watched her go, shaking her head amusedly before turning away and going in the opposite direction.

She entered her and Shawn's room, smiling at the sight of Shawn splayed out over the bed, his nose in a case file that Chief Vick had forced upon him, believing that he was getting too caught up in Juliet's case, and that it would do him some good to try to solve other cases as well. He glanced up, meeting her eyes.

"Hey, Jules," he grinned. She smiled, moving to sit next to him on the bed. He sat up and wrapped an arm around her waist, letting her curl into his side.

"Is my romantic advice really that bad?" he whispered in her ear. She jerked away.

"You were listening?!"

He smiled, raising a finger to his head. "I didn't need to, remember?"

She frowned. "I thought you quit this stuff," she gestured to the finger, "after you wanted to become a cop."

He shook his head. "Only the Chief, Lassiter, and a few other cops know. To the public, I'm just the sad psychic who, after losing his wife, decided to take her place."

She smiled as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Besides, why would I miss the opportunity to eavesdrop on my two favorite girls?"

"What about Sophie?"

"She's too smart and cute to be my favorite. Like you, but with my awesome hair."

"Since when was your hair awesome?"

"Since always, Jules, don't tell me you didn't notice!"

She shook her head amusedly.

He smiled as she snuggled up against him again, laying her head on his shoulder. "You're not going to run a background check on Luke, are you?"

He grinned deviously.

"I already did."

"You what?!"

He kissed the top of her head. "I had to go to her school a month ago for these parent teacher conference things, and when I saw one of Emily's friends point to Luke and then look at her, I put two and two together and figured it out."

She sighed. "I guess those detective skills are really coming in handy," she said. He grinned again.

"Shawn?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you mind if I took a look at the case file?" she said, gesturing to the file in his hands. He smiled and handed it to her.

"I think it's the secretary," said Shawn. She shook her head.

"She has an airtight alibi, Shawn."

She smiled, feeling him pout against her hair.

"But it's always the secretary, Jules!"

She rolled her eyes. "There's a first time for everything," she reminded him. He shook his head.

"Who else could it be?"

She shrugged, turning back to the file. Then, after a minute,

"Jules?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you think you're going to go back to being a detective?"

She sighed again. "I don't know, Shawn. I- I want to, but I just feel like everything's happening really fast, and… I just want to get settled in my old life, with you, before I do anything else."

He nodded. "That's good," he said. She raised an eyebrow at him. He grinned.

"I know it's selfish, but I want to spend as much time with you as possible."

She smiled back, wrapping her arms around his waist. "Me too," she murmured, resting her head in the crook of his neck. He kissed her head again, hugging her tightly. The case file lay forgotten in front of the oblivious, happy couple. They were together again, and that was what mattered.

* * *

**Author's Note: **

**Ok, so I ****_really _****didn't know what to name this chapter. And sorry for the long wait, but... Finals! **

**So, yes, Juliet will get her badge back sometime in the near (or far) future. And, yes, Lukie will definitely make a reappearance! **

**Free virtual pineapples to whomever reviews this story! And here's one to goad you over:**

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**Reviews make me feel like I'm on a sugar high (or pineapple high)! I love reviews almost as much as Shawn loves Juliet, or as much as Lassiter loves Marlowe, or as Gus loves Rachel, or as Chief Vick loves her husband, or as Chelsea loves Henry! Heh... Just thinking about that creepy stalker girl makes me want to laugh out loud. But if I did, I would probably get strange looks from the people around me...**

**Anyways, now that I'm done with my rant... If anyone has any ideas for renaming this story, please tell me, because I think that the term RIP might be a bit misleading. And also, as you can probably tell, my picture for this story is REALLY messed up. Any tips on fixing that are GREATLY appreciated!**


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